A few weeks ago I was having some meltdown, don't remember why now. But I finished my rant with "....And nobody ever gives me flowers!" He asks me to repeat that. I did, nobody ever gives me flowers.
Of course he replies that I don't even like flowers. He reminds me that on Valentine's Day he gave me flowers and at that time I had said, "For future reference I don't like flowers..." Then I proceeded to tell him what would be suitable substitutions.
Now it's not so much that I hate flowers. I mean they're pretty, if you give me some I'll accept them and I'll enjoy seeing them until they wilt and die. I'm practical (no, for real :) ) flowers are expensive, more so if you're getting them from a florist (rather than at the grocery store). I'd prefer like maybe a helium filled mylar balloon weighted down with a king sized Hershey bar, or a hand written love letter rolled up and tied with a ribbon....or like wild flowers from a field in some kind of bottle. So anyway....
Not sure why I'm bitching about flowers, actually I do, but that's beside the point. He asks which is it, do I or do I not like flowers....Are flowers expected now or what. I told him to shut up, and that was that.
Yesterday he tagged along running errands with the bro. We are technically homeless since I cleaned out the apartment last week. We'll be here until our house is ready for move in. So, when he and bro get back home, the boys and I (along with my nephew) are watching TV. Before he can make his way to me he yells out to close my eyes. I do and when he says open them he's standing in front of me with flowers in hand and a gift bag. I had to laugh at the flowers. They were from the grocery store (I hope!) and he'd cut them down to fit into red solo cup being used for a vase. A ribbon was wrapped around the cup.
"Do you like them?"
What could I say, right? I stood up to kiss him and thanked him. They were pretty flowers, it was a mixed variety :) I put them on a nearby table to check out the gift bag. In the gift bag was a harmonica. A fkn harmonica.
No shit, I asked why he'd give me a harmonica. He said that one night while watching The Voice I mentioned that I wished I could play a musical instrument. (A contestant had done her audition playing a guitar.) Really? A harmonica. Um, I thanked him. It's not a guitar....I suppose I could "learn" how to make music on it. 😔😔😔
After all that I asked if he'd brought me flowers because it was our one month anniversary, he said he'd forgotten about that (gee, I'd only mentioned it 73 times that morning). He said he just did it "because". That'll work 💛💛💛
After these die I'll tell him I'm fine with these being the last flowers ever given to me.
I do not like flowers, I must remember this.